Not many people know that one month after Robert and I were married we had to make a big decision. Have Robert go to court and be sued for thousands of dollars, or have him file for Bankruptcy. Yes this is a shock and as a very new wife, it was a huge shock to me. I had no idea that my new husband had so much debt, a debt that he was very much ashamed of . After reviewing very lengthy court documents I came to realize that Robert had debt from when, what in my mind just a kid, At nineteen he had no idea what credit cards, a car loan, unpaid student loans could mount up fast and stay. They don't go away. So my very upset husband at this time at the age of 25 was lost. He had a new wife and questions were going through his mind. Would his wife stay? Would she look at him in a different way? How could we start a family ?
I remember one night sitting on the couch with Robert , I grabbed his hand and said, " You are mine forever and always. Through thick and thin, we cling to each other and I'll never let go."
Each and every month for the past five years Robert and I have paid a Bankruptcy payment. Each and every month we could have been paying for a very expensive car, a new camping trailer, or really just saving that money!! Every time I had to send off that check I wanted to cry. I felt as if I was pulling $500 plus out of the account and just burning it, or letting it fly away in the wind. We have had very tough months. Months were the only way I could buy formula for my baby was to ask my mother, with tears in my eyes for $20.
Now with me not having a job and Robert working as mush as he can, we are feeling that burden of paying a Bankruptcy becoming heavier. The sacrifices my parents made for us and our future never really made an impact on me, until I myself was faced with making those same sacrifices. I remember the stories my parents would tell us, how they were so poor when were little ( my siblings an I) that my parents never went anywhere. They didn't have the gas money let alone money for entertainment purposes.
Ok I could sit here and make this out to be a sob story, but its really not. I'm so very happy to say that this Bankruptcy will be over in Two Months!!! Some questions could be going through your head right now and let me clean them up. NO not once was I ever mad at Robert for keeping his debt from me. I married the 25 year old man ( now 32) who I knew, I didn't marry his past. No this never impacted our marriage in a bad way. We grew closer and learned to never keep secrets from each other. Sometimes we are a little too open haha. Yes it was worth it to file a Chapter 13 Bankruptcy and pay off all the debt, instead of making a cut and run deal.
I just had a conversation with my very best friend Beth, we both decided that love is so much more than money. Money will come and go, and might make your life easier. But Marriage is for life, the love and support that you give to your spouse should be the most important part of your day.
